Zestful One

Quizzie time

Posted by IcedNyior on December 14, 2004  |  No Comments

I was bored the other nite so i surfed around doing Quizzes and here are a few of em:

You’re a Confident Chica You’re a total superstar – and you know it Even if no one else does (in which case you’ll remind them) You hate to admit that you’re wrong… even to yourself Your life is great - and you’ve thankful for every great thing you have Are You Confident? Take This Quiz :-)

Guys Like That You’re Fun You’re the type of girl guys brag about knowing That’s because you’re cool, funny, and laid back You’re smart enough to know how to be one of the guys But flirty enough to know how to make them all want you What Do Guys Like About You? Take This Quiz :-)

{I dont agree with the last line tho}

You Are Low Maintenance Otherwise known as “too good to be true” You’re one laid back chica – and men love that! Just remember that no good guy likes a dormat. So if you find your self going along to get along… Stop yourself and put up a little bit of a fight. Are You High Maintenance? Take This Quiz :-)

Your True Sign Is Aries

Daring | Friendly | Energetic | Risk Taking | Dynamic Daredevil | Always on an Adventure
Without a Care in the World | Quick-Witted and Quick-Tempered
What’s Your True Zodiac Sign? Take This Quiz :-)

~*~*~*~
Oh yeah, i met up with Emy & xmen and a friend of theirs that day at Nandos for Lunch on Monday (12/12). I was really absolutely totally late (1 hr) {so sorry guys!!} and they had to leave like in half an hour. Felt a bit kekok, dunno why.
They commented that Im very very shy. Well, I usually am when i first meet people face to face…..takes me time to warm up…after that it;s ok :D

.: Melancholic Rain :.

Posted by IcedNyior on December 13, 2004  |  No Comments

.: Melancholic Rain :.

I stood near my window today,
Watching the rain fall,
Letting go of all thoughts,
Just closing my eyes and listening.

The rumbling thunder in the distance,
Water trickling down my window,
Droplets of rain on the glass,
Making soft pattering like children running.

Like washing my pain away,
My hurts, my pain, my life,
Evoking emotions deep inside,
Bringing longing to my heart.

Longing for home, for the people I miss,
For the memories I hold dear,
For the loved ones I left behind,
And a single tear, like rain, flows down my cheek.
(c) Fiona J

I started writing this poem in my head while on the way back from Uni, in the bus, watching the rain outside the window and “Emotions” by Destiny’s Child was playing on the radio. seems to fit the entire sombre, melancholic mood. Only got to write it out properly recently, when it was raining again.

friendship surpasses time & space

Posted by IcedNyior on December 11, 2004  |  No Comments

Went out with some ppl from Miri yesterday (Fri). Sids was driving and he picked Pam & I up before picking Raffy, Dee Dee & Kelvin (DD’s bro) from KJ LRT station. We went to his (sids) hse for bout an hour – makan all the kuih muih & cookies….I sempat tapau chocolate crinkle cookies :P

Then we went to Kolej Damansara Utama (KDU) for some so-called “rave” which was more like a lame attempt to party. Sids had a performance, a fire dance. Waving around balls of “fire” (they were actually glowsticks) attached to a chain. It was cool tho.

Then after like 1/2 hour of sitting there, we decided to go to One Utama to eat dinner. So we were thinking about where to eat and we decided on – you guessed it! – Nandos. Reached there around 9.30pm and was told to wait another half hour before the chicken was ready….tsk tsk!!

So we took all sorts of silly photos and stuff before eating. Pam and I probably ate the most!! *dengan tidak malu nya* coz i had a really early lunch (around 11 am) and no dinner.

After that Pam stayed over and we talked and talked till around 3 something am. Nuts!!

So…here are the pics :) Click for a bigger pic!

Fire dancing skills : Ansen /Sids

Fire dancers / Lepakin in KDU

Sids the money man / Posing hp

Pam & I / Group pic in Nandos

Life must go on…

Posted by IcedNyior on December 8, 2004  |  No Comments

Thanks for everyone’s concern. No, im not feeling better. Still feel as shitty as before. But life has to go on I guess. I have been blogging offline. Didnt really feel like uploading it. What’s the point? No one’s actually reading it anyway *sigh*

yet another boring day of commuting. Except that I had to go much earlier, coz my dad needed to get to work earlier. But the upside was my mom picked me up staraight after class, around 11 am. So i manage to get home earlier. Ate chicken rice for breakfast+lunch+hightea at around 2pm. Yummy…havent eaten that for ages. Probably had too much nasi lemak wif ayam goreng.

Oh yeah, Im goin to be home alone till Sat coz my family went to stay in Sunway Hotel (my dad has a room there for some business meeting). I didnt want to go because hte only thing to do is eat, sleep, watch tv, go swim, repeat. since i can do all that at home, i might at well stay at home so that i can at least go online.

As of today, i have 3 assignments (more like the last assignment for the whole sem, carries about 20% of total grade)

1. IT Assignment – the one i mentioned on monday, its kind of overdue but the lecturer is pretty lenient and the work is very easy anyway.
2. Design studies assignment – designing a corporate logo complete with stationary (letterhead, namecard, file, envelope, ect) and a brochure. Due next week Monday and havent started. My other groupmates are doin d brochure, so my job is juz to draw out hte logo and print/photocopy whereever necessary.
3. A research essay for business management – its actually on PETRONAS. Have to answer a few questions on how the teories we learnt are implemented in the company. Part (a) & (c) is finished by my other groupmates. I havent started on my part yet. and that’s due on Thursday.

CAnt stand it…ahve to sleep….will wake up and complete all my assignments tomorrow. Yes im a procrastinator.

Oh yeah, no more classes, juz have to hand up all the assignments and then attend the final exams on 16th – 17th Dec. After that, im FREE till next semester (starting 16th Feb)

Business class as usual. Other groups presented their topics, seemed a bit messy and I got all confused. Lucky the lecturer gave notes *phew!*

I so hate going to uni lately. I have class from 9-11 am on mondays and wednesdays, 11-12.30 pm on Tuesdays but I have to take a bus at 7.30 am and come back using the 3pm bus, meaning i’ll reach home around 4.30pm. Commuting SUCKS!!

I dreamt I was captured by some creature – looks a lil like a Minatour – to a big, white marble hall with wide columns and tall glass doors/windows along the sides. I slipped out an open window while d creature wasnt looking and flew(??) to hide in bushes nearby. The flying sensation was wonderful, as if i were swimming in air. I flew away, passing thru other hses & Gardens.

As i woke up, i remembered that I had a VERY SIMILAR dream many years ago. That EXACT sensation of flying/swimming in air…and running away from someone. Im 100% sure i had a similar dream, and im 80% sure i dreamt it when i first moved from Miri to KK in 1997-1998

I believe dreams are products of our subconcious. I dont think it can tell the future but perhaps give an insight to what we’re feeling inside. Currently im juz wondering what the state of my subconcious mind is…

Oh yeah, i had IT class today and forgot all about an assignment i was supposed to hand up. Goin to email it to the lecturer as soon as i finish (coz i havent started). On a more positive note, that was my class class on Monday.

My laughter masks my pain

Posted by IcedNyior on December 5, 2004  |  1 Comment

So many things has happened lately. IF you’ve been reading the past few posts, I’m feeling really down coz of dissapointments. I’ve been set up numerous of times by people so said we’d meet but never end up calling – guys mostly. What do u expect? *sigh*

I cried the other day while having a fight with my mom. It was a small thing at first, then all the hurt & injustice i felt bout being uprooted & moved started to pour out. People ask, how do I find my new life? I just give a typical answer “ok” but in reality, my whole being struggles. Trying hard to accept the new life here. Im adapatable but at the moment, my world is falling apart. I have not adjusted to life here. I dont have a single friend. The people I go out with are either people I know from KK or Miri who are studying/staying here. Ironically, i kno more friends online than offline.

And I dont have a choice on where I am…

Even writing this brings tears to my eyes. I’ve been struggling to post this for days now, instead, i deviate on other meaningless posts. When in reality, im hurt, cut, suffering inside. Feeling lonely. But no one understands.

How can u talk about being lonely to (a) someone who is in a relationship? (b) someone how “loves the other half” so much that they are engaged/thinking of getting engaged? (c) someone who is only interested in talking bout the gal he likes? (d) someone who is also single but gets more depressed about it because of low self esteem? (e) someone whom you hardly know? (f) someone who is snuggled in the security of friends and family?

Its times like these that I wish i had someone dear, someone to hold, someone’s shoulder to cry one, someone to say “things will work out, I am here”. I was reading Merv’s blog and realized that some of the things that he wrote were exactly what I felt. Lonely……Im feel that Im beginning to sound desperate, but Im not. Being single is something i have always enjoyed. But to have love dangling close and then dissapear is tough. In a year, this has happened twice. Coupled with moving, & bad grades, im actually surprised that I lasted this long.

At hte moment, my life is meaningless, no purpose, no direction. Not because of the loneliness alone, but also other factors. Waking up in the morning is a chore. Sometimes I wish that I could just sleep my days away – so that I wouldnt have to face the world. There is no point isnt there.

Im not suicidal…….i’ve been through that stage of trying to cut my wrists many years ago, and I wouldnt want to walk down that road again….

Sometimes I wish my life is only a dream, that i’d sleep and wake up finding that things were as it was when I was happier – a few years back. When I actually enjoyed living. When life then had a purpose, had meaning, had direction, had a reason to get up in the morning.

But i kno more than anyone else that the hands of time cannot change. What is gone is gone. Now nothing is left but memories and an empty shell.

~~*~~
Current mood: Very depressed, isnt it f**king obvious?!?!
Now Listening to: “Counting Stars” by Switchfoot – counting stars wishing I was okay….

Will this never end??

Posted by IcedNyior on December 4, 2004  |  No Comments

Friends from KK were planning to go out together today but eventually they didnt call me up. Will this never end? People always do that to me. Why :’(

Oh well, im currently debating whether I should move all my older entries all into Blogger. On second thought, i’d rather not lah. Juz in case blogger loses my older entries. Goinna keep my older blogs a secret, something only I can read and laugh and cry about.

Im not really in the mood to update much so I guess i’d juz reply tag board.

adk77, kalau nak lyric English translation utk Suteki Da Ne, click here.

eein:is tt a jap song??? weeee!! drop by to say hi. hehe. neways, thx for tagging me. ­
coconutice : yeah, “Suteki Da Ne” is in Japanese

12/04/2004 12:50 am

Lil PiNk:I MISSS UUUUUU WAAAHHHHH!!!­
coconutice : miss u too dear~!!

12/03/2004 02:03 pm

Jess:cookies cookies cookies…hehehe ­
coconutice: jess, did u get my email? I need ur addy :P

12/03/2004 12:01 pm

kim69:Fi, u got my msg? plz reply me abt it~ thanks!!!
coconutice: Sori, kekurangan credit. i cant really help u coz i myself duno.

12/03/2004 08:19 am

Kak Pah:kubang pasu ilh slh 1 daerah d kedah. jitra pula slh 1 pekan kecil dlm daerah kubang pasu.
coconutice : ooh…i tak pernah pegi Kedah

Expectations….(part 2)

Posted by IcedNyior on December 2, 2004  |  No Comments

Afternoon : I told lian bout my situation with Friend #3 and he made my day. Thanks bro!! Anyway, im planning to meet up with Friend #1 today….yes, he finally called…im kinda nervous actually.

10 pm : Was supposed to meet Friend #1 at PWTC. He cancelled while i was on the LRT in KL Central…..wud d hell!?!?! Wasted my time….i am SO goinna get pissed if he calls tomorrow (Fri)

Im so not looking forward for tomorrow coz one of the guys i’ve been complaing about (yeah, the one that is very manja and sensitive) is coming tomorrow. and im forced to meet him, whether i like it or not. And I have to put on a face like im happy to see him

Christmas Wish List

Posted by IcedNyior on December 1, 2004  |  No Comments

Surf around your friendslist (or friendsfriends, or just random journals) to see who has posted their list. And now here’s the important part:
1. If you see a wish you can grant, and it’s in your heart to do so, make someone’s wish come true.
2. You needn’t spend money on these wishes unless you want to. The point isn’t to put people out, it’s to provide everyone a chance to be someone else’s holiday elf–to spread the joy. Gifts can be made anonymously or not–it’s your call.

There are no rules with this project, no guarantees, and no strings attached. Just…wish, and it might come true. Give, and you might receive. And you’ll have the joy of knowing you made someone’s holiday special.

My List:

1. Digital pictures of friends from 2003 and earlier (Curtin pics especially). My PC got reformatted and I dont have some pics *cries*. Please email them to my yahoo. That has 1G storage :P

2. REAL Christmas cards. With an actual message for me inside. Not juz “Dear Fiona, Merry Christmas! God Bless, (name)”. I want something meaningful, something real, something personal. (and for my add, please PM me. My contacts are on the top left under my profile.)

3. “Deception Point” and/or “Digital Fortress” by Dan Brown

4. Roses, can be one or one dozen. I have never gotten flowers before (sad case rite). Preferably from a guy fren lah!

5. Call me on Christmas to wish me. This is especially for those who are staying in a different state/area/country then me. Particularly a Ms Grace. :P

6. I would love to have an external hard drive. Preferebly 20G and more

7. I have always always wanted an iPod mini in white. Ever since the iPod came out, i’ve been staring at it through shop windows longing secretly for it.

8.This is kinda OTT (over the top) but i would like a return ticket from KLIA to Miri (MYY) some time in March during a weekend. Airasia or MAS, doesnt matter

9 . Message bag from roominteriorproducts. Costs RM 99. Its the Orange one:

Expectations….

Posted by IcedNyior on December 1, 2004  |  No Comments

I realized that I expect too much of people. Not in a negative way though. It’s just that sometimes, I put them on a pedestal so high that when they don’t meet my expectations I feel disappointed. No, its not their fault, its me who expects too much perhaps.

Friend #1
I didn’t expect much of you, but I did expect that you AT LEAST hold to your words. You said we’ll meet. You said we’ll hang out together. You said you’d make time for me. You said you’ll ring me up. You have not done all these things. I have virtually given up on you. You are not worth the time or the effort!

Friend #2
I always thought that if I were close friends with you –the same gang I hang out with in Secondary school – that you’d tell me if you had a boyfriend. But No, you preferred to keep quiet about it. I thought we were supposed to share stuff about our lives. We live less than an hour apart and yet we have only met ONCE. I had to find out stuff about you from someone
else, someone we both weren’t close to. I now officially consider you just a normal friend.

Friend #3
I always thought that if we were best friends, we’d always stay that way. That our friendship will transcend time and space. Yes, I know we were apart for almost 1 year, and yes, I expected some things to change. But now I feel that I’m always the one initiating contact. After meeting
up with you after a year without constantly talking & hanging out with you, I feel disappointed. Disappointed that you couldn’t at least muster up more enthusiasm in seeing me. Yes, I
kno you have many friends and other priorities. But you have been one of the top priorities in my life, and always will. You claim you miss me, but do u really? Your problem, my dear boy, is that you have too many friends & acquaintances that you forget who the friends who really changed your life are.

Gal I just met
Look, I just met you, and you already gave me a really bad impression of you. I should give you allowances because you’re only 15, but please, wipe that annoyed look of your face. Its obvious you like J and is constantly whining for his attention, and he, being the good guy he is, juz layan you. Don’t come over merengek-ing when Im talking with him, or giving me this “im-so-jealous-i-want-to-kill-you” look. We happen to be really good friends so live with it!!

Brat from KK
Hey, I kno you’re rich and all, but no point snubbing me like that. You are a proud, spoilt rich kid who needs to be kidnapped and thrown into the poorest community in the world and forced to live like a slave. You wouldn’t survive in a jungle for a day alone. So what if your dad owns a restaurants and shop and ur mom has her own business while my dad is only an accountant and my mom is a homemaker? I kept trying to catch your eye to say “hi” and u purposely looked away. What the hell??!?!

…today I did…

About my day, I spent the whole day at home and the whole evening till night in Sunway Piramid for a conference. It was ok but not as good as I expected. Oh and I got to meet Jeremy, meeting him brings back lots of happy memories. Need time to sit down and really have a long chat with him before he goes back to KK.

I seem to have the weird urge to spend money lately. I so TOTALLY HATE shopping and i think that window shopping is a freakin waste of time. What’s the point of walking all over the mall, and trying out so many things and come out empty handed or with only one item. The only time i actually go to the shops is when I actually need something specific, like shoes, or a bag, or stationary, or books (i dont mind buying good books). Anyway, i popped into FOS and bought a
halter top…really nice one…which was pink, i dun usually wear pink. But it was very cheap RM20 only. Oh yeah, and i spent like RM10 on archery – 24 arrows. Archery is a something that not many people know I play. Its a great way to relieve stress. Just imagine the person face on the bullseye and shoot. I didnt play a good game today, and my upper arm felt a little strained after.

I downloaded the new Mozilla Firefox browser to test it out. It seems faster than Internet Explorer and the BEST part i like about it is that it has a multi-tabbing system. Meaning that instead of opening links in new windows, i can open it in one window, but in multiple tabs. Like when you open Microsoft® Excel and u can open lots of different documents in it. Yeah, Firefox works the same way. To get it, click the LINK on the right sidebar —>

Oh yeah, I got a new abang angkat. This guy I met thru the Evenstarr fanboard forum thingy. Really nice guy, funny & sama palak (direct translation: same head. Indirect translation: like same thinking, attitude, ect). His name is Lian. Yay! One more person to bully~! :P Hehe!
{Ko iboh kembang gila coz ko kena mention dlm blok kmk tok Lian :P}
~~*~~

Current mood: Nervous and dissapointed
Now Listening to: “Broken” by Amy Lee & this other guy whom i forgot his name. LOL – coz im broken when im lonesome

You know you’re Malaysian when..

Posted by IcedNyior on December 1, 2004  |  1 Comment

1. You complain about the quality of the pirated DVD you just purchased. “What, RM10 for DVD5?! Aiyah, boss … sound no good, cheaperlah …”
2. You’re willing to consume sambal petai and durian and gladly suffer the bloating and wind-breaking incidents.
3. You’re exceedingly polite to the Mat Sallehs but you slag your own kind. “Hello, sir. Why don’t you sit here, it’s got the best view of the city skyline.” But, “Aunty-ah, your table is over there next to the kitchen.”
4. You order Maggi goreng and fried chicken, complain about how oily the food is, and then proceed to finish it anyway.
5. You love to talk about food. You’re already thinking about what to have for dinner while eating lunch. “I’m stuffed. What shall we have for dinner?”
6. You dive into a communal-style meal the moment the dish lands on the table only to hesitate at the last morsel of food on the serving dish. There are two possible explanations for this: the first is the pai seh (embarrassed) factor, while the other is the myth that the person who eats the last piece will be a spinster.
7. You hit the accelerator the moment the first drop of rain hits your windshield. “Alamak, it’s going to rain. Sure traffic jam one. I’d better drive faster.”
8. You seize the opportunity to make a U-turn anywhere … especially where there is a sign telling you not to. Well, so long as the cops aren’t in sight.
9. You feel a burning desire to send text messages and even have the gall to give your friend a blow-by-blow account of the movie to your friend on the handphone — during the screening of the movie. “Okay, now that girl Lizzie is impersonating an Italian singer; she so doesn’t look Italian …”
10. You forsake your loved ones for the all-important four letter-word: S-A-L-E. “Sorry, mum, I can’t take you to Aunt Mary’s because I have to go to MidValley before the crowd.” You’re also more than happy to be part of the insane traffic jam that forms around malls during weekends and sale periods.
11. 11. Reality shows Akademi Fantasia and Malaysian Idol dictate your social life. “What, no TV at the mamak? Count me out — I’m staying home. Rinie needs my support.”
12. You pepper every sentence with lah. “No-lah, I can’t see you today-lah. I have to study-lah. You know-lah, the prison warden aka mak is watching me like a hawk”
13. You fail to function normally without your daily dose of teh tarik and nasi lemak.
14. You have owned at least one Proton in your lifetime. Cheap, cheap. That is until you start to make enough dough to buy that Honda you’ve been salivating over.
15. You slow down at an accident site to take down the car number plate, but won’t step out of your car to help — the victim could be a robber!
16. You’d rather park your car along the main road outside the mall, where there’s a yellow line, rather than pay RM1 to park inside where there are adequate bays.
17. You plead, bat your eyelids and relate a sob story to the officer at the town council office to let you off the hook (or reduce the amount considerably) for the fine you incurred when you parked your car on the double line.
18. You make an appointment for 10am and conveniently show up a half hour late — Malaysian time, what …
19. You pop open the wet tissue packet at the Chinese restaurant by squeezing the trapped air to the top of the packet before proceeding to smash your fist into it. The louder the pop the better.
20. You greet your friend / neighbor / acquaintance on the street with “How are things?” or “Have you eaten?” or better yet, by stating the obvious: “Went to market ah?”
21. Ramlee burger is the “piece de resistance” of your growing-up-years cuisine.
22. You catch all major televised events at the mamak.
23. You have roughly six meals a day (breakfast, mid-morning tea, lunch, afternoon tea, dinner and supper). Then there’s the snacking — keropok ikan, pisang goreng, muruku, jam tarts and the like.
24. You get the whole family dressed to the nines, jump into the car and head for the minister’s open house — and ask for styrofoam boxes and plastic bags to tar pau food.
25. Your accent and language style vary according to the race of the person you are conversing with.
26. You’ve got a friendly disposition. Smiles are abundant and your “Apa khabar?” is warm and sincere.
27. You exclaim loudly how expensive everything is, even though the items may in fact be going for a steal. “Wah! So expensive, ah? Hak sei ngor (Scare me to death)!”
28. You dig deep into your pockets to contribute to the latest appeal for donations in the newspapers.
29. You “dis” our country all the time, but as soon as something good happens (like winning the Thomas Cup), you morph into a proud Malaysian.
30. You never travel abroad without a bottle of chilli sauce, or sachets which you can sneak into restaurants.
31. You’re proud to be Malaysian – and you pass these jokes on to all your Malaysian friends!

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