*One funny conversation I had with cik puteri*

put : amoiiii
put : lama tak nampak
me : dgr khabar…perut cik puteri tidak boleh menghadam makanan kat KK
me :
put : hahahahahahaha
put : siot, aku dah gastrik ko tau tak
me :
put : stress aku takleh makan
put : hebat ko ber-one nite stand tu bah
me :
put : hehehe
put : so comot la u all
put : ur dad n u dah ok ka?
me : yeah
put : hehehe good lah
me : my fren came to sleep over the other day
me : so nak tak nak kena la berbaik
me : (lagipun he gave $$$ )
me :
put : hehehehe
put : senang dirasuah la u
me : tis month miskin sgt la
me :
put : asek kuar jer
me : nak buat apa kat umah
put : ur one nite stand kosong today?
me : rasa nak tembak nick….he sentuh sentuh the template…pastu ilang la pula
put : ayoooo
put : template cantik tu
me : itula
me : kena buat balik
me : mlm tadi i dah bisingkan
put : tengok muka nick, cannot rasa marah laaa
put : kesian aje
me :
me : betul
put : hehee kan

*Gossiping Censored part of the conversation. After that we talked about this….*

put : gambir?
put : for wht?
me : lerr…tatau ke whats gambir for?
put : dunno
put : idont need one kan? hahaha
me : gambir is used to numb things
me : like if u hv insect bites
me : tapi…ada guys can use it to keep their d**k hard..and takde air keluar
me :
put : omigodddddddd
put : hahahaha
put : berkesan ke?
me : yeah, so I’ve heard
me :
put : so, if BJ, girl can bau the gambir la???
me : tapi i never actually say it live
me : kenot BJ la lepas letak gambir.,..later the gal mouth kebas
put : hahahahahahahhahahaa
put : stupid gambir laaaaaaaaaa
put : adoii lawak
me :
me : i cant imagine if a gal BJ
put : liquid or like balm tu?
me : balm?
put : girls p***y also can numb ka???
me : ntah
me :
me : oh ya horr
put :
me : i never tot of that
put :
me : if the inside of the p***y numb,..mesti takbest pula
me :
put : omigodddddddddddd
put : letih aku gelak
put : cannot cum laa camtu
me : im sooo blogging about this
me :
put :
put : can u imagine, p***y rasa numb macam nak pegi cabut gigi tu
put :
put : stupid gambirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
me :
me : cabut gigi
put : u know if nak cabut gigi, kena cucuk tu kan, kebas
put : b4 cabut tu
me :
put : u feel like ur pipi besar
put : now u feel p***y jd besar
put :
me :
me : sialllll
me :
put : i suggest, ban the gambir
put :
put : leh mampos aku gelak nih
me :
put : guna utk main sendiri dah laaa
put : jgn rosakkan p***y org tuu
me : buat apa utk main sendiri??
me : oh…i tot u mean gals main sendiri
me :
put : hahahahahaha
put : girls takyah gambir duhhhhhh
me : itula conpius jap

*had a round of laughter then….*

put : guna jari pun buleh (iklan tu)
me :
me : which iklan is that ahh? forgot
put : i cannot hear tht iklan ok…sure nak tergelak
me : oh..the rambut thingy kan
me :
me : so poyo that gal
me :
put : rejoice i think
put : yg dlm bas rambut dia mengerbang tu
put : kekekekeke
put : wht she meant wasnt the hair i think
put : kakakakakakkaa
me :
put : stupid iklan also
me : u notice or not, she use ALL her jejari
me :
put : yeahhhhhhhh hahahahahahahaha
put : so besar lobang can masuk whole tangan
put : ayaaaaaaa
me :
me : 2 hands beb…10 fingers maaa
me :
put : adeh, aku senak perut la tahan gelak

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Note to lola : eh, si heidi madah raffy madah ktk mok dtg kl tek. Mun mena, iboh lupa call. U can stay at my hse or sumthing. Nangga la kedak ne kelak.

Back when I was in Curtin, I registered myself to be an organ donor. Being wayy past 18 yrs old then, I didnt have to get parental consent. However I had to include the name and address of next-of-kin. In this case, I put in my dad’s because i had no next-of-kin.

The other day, Nick saw it and asked what it was.

Me : Its an organ doner card.
Nick : So you donate your organs la? *with a very puzzled look on his face*
me : Yeah…(duh!)
Nick : All of it?? *astonished expression*
Me : Ya, all my organs & tissues
Nick : So how you live??????
Me : !!!!!

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Since CNY is just around the corner, I saw this on someone’s blog (i forgot the URL).

Born in: 1925 1937 1949 1961 1973 1985 1997

Personality : Intelligent and self-confident. Patient and methodical, helpful and hardworking. Although they might appear rigid and slow, a kind and active mind is beneath. A Natural born under works systematically, the Ox is responsible for family and believes in authority but is sometimes too stubborn and traditional.

The Ox or the Buffalo sign symbolizes prosperity through fortitude and hard work. A person born during this year will be dependable, calm and methodical. A patient and tireless worker, he sticks to routine and conventions. Although he is generally fair-minded and a good listener, it is difficult to make him change his views as he is stubborn and often has strong prejudices.

Still, because of his steady and trustworthy character, the Ox person will be entrusted with positions of authority and responsibility. He will not fall short where duty calls. As a matter of fact, he should be careful not to get carried away.

The Ox likes: Tradition, Appreciation, Organisation, Sobriety and Routine

The Ox dislike: Gimmicks, Parties, Gossip, Laziness and Being Teased

Your Luck In Year 2006

Overall Forecast :Being ruled by the outspoken and invariable character, the Ox is easily disturbed over small matters. You may fall into the traps of people whom you trust. In the year of the Dog, it is more favourable to males than to females. Health luck is moderate.
Your career luck will be very smooth without any obstacles and will bring prosperity. However, businessmen should be alert of vile person’s pitfalls and must not act as guarantor and stay away from others affairs. Take precaution of the attack of cold or epidemic disease. Married couples will enjoy a very sweet conjugal love.

Health : The health of the Ox is not so good, particularly the females, due to their weakness resistance. Take the necessary health protection. Should any old illness relapse, go for medical treatment immediately. Young Ox should keep away from smoking and wine completely. Take care of traffic safety.

Career : Career and work are very good without obstructions but you must not trust people easily to avoid being conned. It is not advisable for employees to change job this year.

Love : Married couples will enjoy their conjugal life even better than ever. However, they should be careful of involvement of a third party which will damage their happy family. Lovers may proceed with their marriage plan.

Wealth : You will make considerable income. Perhaps you can allocate a little part of the finance for a more comfortable living environment and keep the rest as reserve fund for business expansions.

The BBQ I had last nite was quite fun - too much lots of food : marinated beef (3 kg), chicken wings (1 kg), mash potatoes (RM6 worth), sandwiches (2 loaves - trimasih Kak L) & tidbits. But only 8 out of 13 people turned up Most were sick with the flu so cant really help that, but the others had like no money or were busy. Nevermind la

It wasnt as big and grand as the BBQs i used to do at the beach back in KK or Miri. We had like at least 30-40 people at a time, but at that time we were quite the gila-gila type..willing to do anything and everything - jump into the lake, pelt each other with mud, make bonfires on hostel grounds until the guard chased us away, played cho tai ti till 7am, etc, etc - so it was great.

Not to say that last nite was terrible. In fact, it was a nice BBQ among close frens, lots of laughing and joking with each other and cooking and eating. We were so stuffed after. And slightly drunk because there was a bottle of Chivas, JD & Vodka Kurant. Then we went to Azril’s place to watch the Liverpool match (they won 1-0, making someone jump up and down) and makan kacang.

Went back around 2 am…..my whole body felt so heaty that i didnt get to sleep but stayed up trying to go online on dialup (my mom is SO going to kill me when the phone bill comes). Then talked on the phone with a fren for an hr before continuing thru SMS. Only slept around 7 am Sunday.

Incik P called at 2pm ajak lunch at McD so we went for lunch wif Ms E, then went to Ace Hardware, Ikea & Curve to go buy stuff. Then went to her place to use the internet, play tennis and lepak (different ppl do different things la).

Now going to lepak…babai

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An MSN conversation the other day…

~B|aCk^RaVeN~ Malaysia’s Next Top Model~ says:
i tot tat kuih bahulu was kuih berbulu
~B|aCk^RaVeN~ Malaysia’s Next Top Model~ says:
is it nice?
[CoCoNuT^iCe] She sits in the corner, singing herself to sleep… says:
teruk
[CoCoNuT^iCe] She sits in the corner, singing herself to sleep… says:
its nice
[CoCoNuT^iCe] She sits in the corner, singing herself to sleep… says:
made of egg..sweet and fluffy
~B|aCk^RaVeN~ Malaysia’s Next Top Model~ says:
ahah
[CoCoNuT^iCe] She sits in the corner, singing herself to sleep… says:
but no bulu
~B|aCk^RaVeN~ Malaysia’s Next Top Model~ says:
LoL!

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My parents’ conversation the other day while preparing to go to Tg Malim (my mom is from there)…

Dad : Aren’t you going to buy some oranges to bring back?
Mom : No need la, we’re still going again on CNY eve. You always shoot out something off the top of your head.
Dad : Nolah, I can shoot something between my thighs. *laughs*
Mom : Aiya…u ahh!!

*I just pretended i didnt hear anything*

I was smsing around to look for a BBQ pit because im planning to have a small one soon. So i smsed Siddiq to ask.

Me : Sid, do u hv a BBQ Pit? Planning on collecting money to organize a BBQ at my place.
Sid : I hv 1 BBQ with gas and another 1 normal type. Got student discount or not?
Me : So how big is the normal pit? Im thinking of making mash potatoes oso so
need to borrow utensils.
*after a few hrs*
Sid : Sorry for the late reply. fone no batt. My pit is quite small, a bit smelly and hairy.
Me : ……

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p/s: to those who got my sms, please RSVP asap. Thanks

Some YM conversations I had recently:
Me: i was so confused as to why there was soooo many ppl in ikano..coz its a monday
incik amat:
Me: then i realized…its a pubic hol
incik amat: sultans besday
Me: opps *shocked expression* I mean….public *laughs*
incik amat: yup its a pubic holiday *gelak guling*

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Hairy: i sit by a window in my office n the aircon seems rather underpowered
Me: hehe
Me: at least ur nipples wont be erect cos of the cold
Hairy: the heat are making other things erect if u get what i mean
Hairy: hahahaha
Me: i didnt kno the ‘other things’ was heat sensitive?
Me: i kno they shrivel up in the cold tho…ahha
Me: didnt kno it works viceversa…hahaha
Hairy: i was referring to the hair on my arms
Hairy: lol
Me: hahaha
Me: i tot hair all over reacts the same way…even hair on your buttocks…
Me: if u hv a hairy ass la
Me: hahaha
Hairy: woman
Hairy: im like king-effing-kong
Hairy: im all about hair everywhere
Hairy: lol
Me: ew ew ew ew!!!
Me: so disgusting
Me: chest hair turns me off…and when i see nipple hair, i feel like plucking them off
Hairy: u havent seen nothing yet
Hairy: i have bellybutton hair
Hairy: haha
Me: …..

Last week or so I worked in this research/surveying company doing English to BM translations for RM6/hour. Its NOT as easy as I imagined it to be. I had an english-BM dictionary (to help translate) on one hand, and a BM dictionary (to help find the perfect word) on the other, with a laptop in the middle - running on PIII btw. At first was using a PC that was running on 64MB RAM then i got changed to use the laptop. Spent the whole day doing like 30-40 sumthing questions. Man it was not easy translating all those technical terms to BM, such as - navigational aid system, interactive voice response (tindakbalas interaktif suara).

Anyway, today i was talking with farm (who helped me get the job):
Farmy: weh bos i kata ur translation superb!!
Me: *laughed* okeh..lain kali bayar lah extra!
Me:
Farmy: chait
Me: this is something i hv to blog about
Me: the translation thingy
Farmy: cool
Farmy: yeah [the boss] came in n tanya
Farmy: siapa did it
Farmy: u know my malay kan hampas
Farmy: she said very good n interesting

So take tat SPM marker who gave me a B3 for my SPM. see, i am good in BM

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Another bit of conv with a friend who put his status as *webcam icon* “View my Black Ass”:

AssMan (12/8/2005 6:29:01 PM): meh tgk wecam kejap nak tanya aje clear ke idak
Me (12/8/2005 6:29:02 PM):omg, ur ass is BLACK?!?
AssMan (12/8/2005 6:29:17 PM): view kejap meh
AssMan (12/8/2005 6:29:34 PM): clear ke?
Me (12/8/2005 6:29:44 PM): nak tgk bontot gak
AssMan (12/8/2005 6:30:27 PM): gi ler usha bontot kat starbuck tu
Me (12/8/2005 6:30:34 PM): bontot sini tak best

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Something i got off an email…gave me a good laugh:
:: The Cardiologist’s Funeral ::

One of the city’s top cardiac specialists died. At his funeral, his coffin was placed in front of a huge replica of a heart made of red roses. When the pastor finished the sermon and everyone said their good-byes, the large heart opened up, the coffin rolled inside, and the heart closed again. It was a majestic tribute to the much loved cardiologist.

Suddenly, one of the mourners burst into a fit of laughter. Irritated by his insensitivity, the man sitting next to him asked, “Why are you laughing, Mister?”

“I was just thinking about my own funeral,” the man replied. “I’m a gynaecologist”…
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Oh but i got this for my birthday from my sisters. Its a coin pouch from Body Shop & MTV to increase awareness on AIDS and HIV. It even comes with a condom {one where got enough?} hidden in the back flap. I love the condom colour and design of it..so cute!

This is the unclear pic i took using my camera phone. U can see the condom on the right…yes..Durex : for better protection. The white/red thingy at the bottom is a leaflet about AIDS and HIV.
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Oh and actually i had an extreamly crappy morning - i woke up wonderful but got into an argument with Mom, felt really tired (coz couldnt sleep last nite) and i look and felt like shit. But well, many amusing things happened so I guess my day turned out ok